Saturday, February 07, 2009

Sick Of

Having to buy new bras every two months. I'm nearing the 200 lb mark and I had to go digging to find a bra that would work this morning, stuffing myself into a 40DD. With four months left, how big are these melons going to get? I'm scared.

Friday, February 06, 2009

25 Things About Me

I did this excercise about 2.5 years ago, but if the New York Times is writing about Facebook's 25 Random Things , then I guess I need to do it too. Then maybe I'll stop being tagged. Plus, most of my 101 random things from Oct. 2006 don't exactly apply anymore.

So the most random, off the top of my head:

1. Some things don't change. I'm still an INTJ. So is Donald Rumsfeld. Great.

2. I got married for the second time in April 2008 to the second husband that I met at work.

3. I have a hyphenated last name now. I always thought people with hyphenated last names were sort of douchey, but it worked and I like it. I still have trouble remembering to add that last syllable, though, and it always sounds like an afterthought. And 10 months later and I still haven't changed my driver's license.

4. I now have a 9 year old stepdaughter and a baby on the way.

5. We're not finding out the sex of the baby. We're not telling anyone our baby names, although I laughed pretty hard when I saw a few of them on Queerty's Baby Naming Guide.

6. I have done lots of "bad" things during this pregnancy like dye my hair, eat soft cheese, cold cuts and brought my pulse above 140. I don't feel guilty about these things. I don't shoot heroin or have 3 martini lunches. I'm a big believer in perspective.

7. I hate fundamentalism in all forms. I didn't know about the child rearing fanatics until I got pregnant, but they are my newest people to hate on. I am, however, enjoying reading these folks.

8. I really miss running, but I'm proud of myself for finishing a 10K in good time in my first trimester.

9. I kind of hate on people who think you are interested in every aspect of their pregnancy, but based on most of my responses above, I am one of them.

10. I've been taking creative writing classes since I moved up to Cambridge and it's one of the best things I've ever done for myself.

11. When I was in fifth grade, my teacher thought I lied about writing a poem that I read in class. When she realized that it was mine, she gave me a green notebook and told me to write about everything if I wanted to be a writer. I've kept a journal ever since. I still have that first one.

12. I've never developed any proper career plan beyond "be a writer." I like my career, but I just sort of fell into it. I spend a lot of time feeling lost, even though I know I'm decent at what I do.

13. For the first time, I am actively searching for markets for my writing. I still hope to get published. Even better? I still hope to make some money at this. I'd take a dollar at this point.

14. I am looking forward to buying new clothes again. I love clothes and shoes and bags and any website or magazine or blog devoted to the above.

15. I love Diane Von Furstenberg, Ralph Lauren, Calvin Klein and on the lower end, JCrew. All classics. I don't get Marc Jacobs and the hipster devotion to his lines.

16. I have an absurd amount of Cole Haan shoes.

17. I can't remember the last time I bought any new music. All my new music and new favorite bands are from about 10 years ago. This makes me feel incredibly old.

18. Rushmore is still my favorite movie, although I watch a grotesque amount of bad romantic comedies when YG is away. P.S. I Love You has to rank as one of the worst movies that I ever saw -- up there with the one where Sarah Michelle Geller is a cook with magical powers. That one was so bad I don't even remember the title.

19. If I don't grab the remote right away, I end up having to endure YG's shows -- FutureWeapons, Mythbusters, Dirtiest Jobs, lots of shit with cars and guns, etc. I really don't understand how a man who watches these could make fun of me for still watching Grey's Anatomy.

20. I listen to NPR all the time, but I am sometimes annoyed by the announcers' I'm-so-smart-can't-you-tell-how-smugly-smart-I-am voices.

21. I still buy way too many books. I have stacks of books that I'm going to read someday "when I have the time."

22. I think that bacon, egg and cheese on a bagel with a side of fries is the most divine meal ever.

23. People say that I drive like a grandma, but I beg to disagree. If I'm driving, you need to shut up. Also, DO NOT touch the radio dial. I will cut you.

24. I've been out of college for over a decade and I still wish that I could recreate the kind of fantastic atmosphere that exisits when you live within a few blocks of all your best friends and the most stressful thing you have to do is study.

25. Finding 25 random things to say about me is much harder than I thought. I can think of numerous "random" things, but I'm not sure if I'd want to make them public on the Internets.

Pregnant, Not Fat

It's been the week from hell at work, and I am glad to be in my pajamas on the couch, even though it's only 9 p.m. We had antipasto for dinner and fondue for dessert and I'm all smiles now.

Earlier in the week, I had my monthly check in with the OB. Zygote is looking healthy and happy, but unfortunately may end up being smothered to death by all my fat. In the first 20 weeks of pregnancy, I gained about 7 pounds and was wondering if I was gaining quick enough. Then in the last few weeks, I've been putting on about 2 pounds a week. Because of all my freakin' issues, I was slightly worried, but then figured that I was just being...well, me.

Then I got to the OB. First the nurse noted that the recent gain was "not good," and then the doctor gave me the more polite "undesirable." They said that I should work out more and limit my sweets, fats, eat more whole grains, blah, blah. I said that I had heard you weren't supposed to diet when you were pregnant. "But it's not a diet." WHATEVER.

Being me, I've spent the week being bipolar. One part of me is feeling horrible and shamed and obsessing about working out, even though I am already working out 4 times a week. My evil twin is screaming, "Are you fucking kidding me? I am PREGNANT. I'm supposed to gain weight." All of me is feeling extremely frustrated.