Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Fat Lard: The Pregnancy Edition

Remember fat lard in an ugly shirt? The pregnancy edition goes something like:

YG: Do you think you can roll over on your other side?
JM: Are you saying I'm fat? That you don't think I'm capable of rolling over onto my side?
YG: The childbirth lady said you should be on your left side.
JM: And you don't think I can do that because I am so fat.
YG: That's exactly what I said.
JM: I am like Orca.
YG: I was thinking more like a manatee.
JM: I can't be a manatee. Manatees are just nice and dumb, but they don't do much.
YG: You're right. You're like a great white.
JM: ???
YG: Feeding machine, with no emotions.
JM: Nice.
YG: (giggle, giggle, giggle, makes sure to repeat joke multiple times so I can comment that he is, yes indeed, funny)
JM: I'm totally going to blog about this and tell everyone you called me fat.

I know that the first few weeks with a baby will likely suck, but god, I hope we keep our funny up.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Inexact Sciences

I keep hearing that determining how much a baby is going to weigh at birth is an inexact science, and I really, really, really hope to god that this is true because the phrase, "if it gets much larger than 10 lbs..." was not really one I was expecting. And frankly, it just makes me cross my legs.

I've been told for my last few visits that I am growing a "substantial" baby. Let's just hope that substantial means large and healthy and not like, a second grader.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Year One

Last year on April 26, YG and I got married. One year later, we spent the weekend in childbirth class. A far cry from a year ago when I was out running in the morning and he was enjoying his coffee at Diesel. We still made it back to The Marlowe and enjoyed some al fresco dining at Dante and a walk along the Charles. It wasn't Paris, but I can't imagine anywhere I'd rather be or anyone I'd rather be with.