I didn't get laid off tonight. I didn't think I would, but there was a piece of me that would have actually been relieved. Don't get me wrong -- I NEED to work and I have a lot of expenses (rent, car payments, credit card debt, the whole freakin' wedding). But there's a part of me that feels that getting laid off now would not be the worst thing that ever happened to me.
It might force the issue of figuring out what to do next. I know that I want to spend more time writing, and I know that I want to use some of my work skills to help our church out more with some of its PR and comms needs. If I wasn't working so much, I could. If I wasn't working so much, I wouldn't have time to fuck around and wonder what I should do next. I would HAVE to figure it out.
There's a part of me that would LOVE to tell my very work-identified parents that I got laid off and that I was going to get a job at Starbucks and "thanks for shelling out that hundred grand on my education and always telling me that I was important and shit and to make you proud. Yeah. Thanks. But I think I'm going to hang out and write poetry, maybe smoke a little pot and make coffee. Okay. And maybe walk dogs too. Hope you're not disappointed or anything." :-)
Oh well. I guess this is for the best and I'll keep on keepin' on if you will.